LISTEN LIVE 80s MUSIC

Thursday, February 28, 2019

GUNS N ROSES MEMES

FUNNY GUNS AND ROSES JOKES

The late 80s were a great time for hard rock, metal, hairbands...music in general. One of the big names was Guns N Roses, GNR for short. Lead by bad-boy Axel Rose!

One of their big hits was Paradise City. An easy to quote song, "take me down to the Paradise City where the grass is green and the girls are pretty." Sounds nice eh?


Alex and Slash both chose Paradise City as their favourite city.
Apparently, there are a few cities out there with the name Paradise. There is one that has a radio station that only plays GNR songs...or so I've heard?


Paradise City where the radio station only plays Guns N Roses songs
Paradise City sounds like Heaven. According to GNR lyrics you need to knock three times on the door of heaven to get in. Apparently, Sheldon Cooper took that seriously and applied it to everyday life.


Knock, Knock, Knockin' on Heaven's Door


Now, I know there has been a lot of 'fat jokes' about Axel lately, but, I won't stoop that low. But, I will share some gossip I heard, that Axel recently had a baby ... Sweet Child Of Mine he said. Lay off the sugar Axel!


Axel Rose new baby Sweet Child Of Mine

Okay, I will delve into some recent memes with Axel, b/c they are insightful and funny.


Overdone it on the carbs lately Alex?
I'll also get political and talk about the differences in society in the 80s and now. Guns are not pc anymore, which is why I think Guns N Roses should change their name to just Roses. Sound good?


Guns N Roses should remove the Guns and become ROSES






Wednesday, February 13, 2019

80s MUSIC JOKES

80s MUSIC HUMOUR

The 80s was such an innocent time wasn't it? I remember bopping away to Olivia Newton John's Physical in my cropped sweatshirt and wrist bands. The music video was obviously about working out and losing weight...which was the physical part right? Apparently not!


Physical by Olivia Newton John was not about getting to the gym
The Greg Kihn band sang, "they don't write 'em like that anymore". Wow, did they get it right! They really don't write songs like they used to back in the 80s. The guy was a prophet!


Greh Kihn was a prophet - they don't write em like that anymore
One person who got things wrong was Lionel Ritchie. He sang songs about feeling great while dancing on the ceiling. There is only one person who can dance on a ceiling and that would be Spider-man. No one else. Dancing alone is not too enjoyable. 


Dancing on the ceiling is not a great feeling.
Lionel did get one thing right, "Hello, is it me your looking for". That is a universal saying. Everyone wants to be looked for. Am I right or am I right? 


Lionel Ritchie Hello Is it me your looking for?
The Cars tried the Hello thing too. But, I guess not many people were named, 'Again'...so that lyric, 'Hello, Hello Again," didn't really stick. Too bad, because I think The Cars were the best new wave band of the 80s! 


The Cars Hello Again didn't stick?
Duran Duran was another one of my 80s bands. I don't recall any "Hello" songs by them. But, a twist on that is this tag I made up at my last 80s convention. Hello my name is Rio and I dance in the sand. I'm so funny.


Hello my name is RIO and I dance in the sand.
My other fav 80s band is Van Halen. Seems like their "Jump" is still popular with the kids nowadays. Everyone has a trampoline it seems and they all sing out, "might as well jump!" while bouncing around! The 80s lives!
Van Halen Jump - great song to sing while on a trampoline
Kids nowadays still do the Safety Dance. Remember, the Men Without Hats song? Yes, the only difference is they dance with their 'friends' on Facebook. Even Mark Zuckerburg has been know to Safety Dance.

Mark recommends doing the Safety Dance with your 'friends' on Facebook
Kids are also using 80s references in everyday life. Like when little arsonists burn a house down they quietly quote Billy Joel's - We Didn't Start The Fire.


We didn't start the fire...
Young people who are starting their careers have also been known to make references to 80s music lyrics. The most interesting man in the world was stopped by the cops recently and was suprised when the Police said to him, 'de do do do, de da da da'.


The Police said to him de do do do de da da da
But us oldies we know our 80s music. Our memories are still holding strong. I find myself singing 80s rock lyrics to myself all the time. Like when I watch the weather network I always find myself humming that awesome song by the Scorpions - Rock you like a tornado!
  
The Scorpions Rock You Like A Hurricane or Tornado or some weather event
If the weather forecast is for high winds I'll be whistling that melody from the Scorpions other song Winds Of Change.  


The Scorpions songs should be played on the weather network
Just like Elton John sang, He's Still Standing...I sing that when I grab my cane and get out of my comfy chair. Don't chairs seem harder to get out of then they were in the 80s. What's up with furniture designers nowadays?

Elton John is still standing
The other day I was in my kid's class at school and hummed that Modern English song I'll Stop The World and Melt With You. The teacher actually stopped and corrected me - apparently, the world cannot stop because of gravity, centrifugal force, and logic! Ouch! 


Modern English was wrong the world cannot stop and melt with you
I argued back that if everyone Wang Chung'd tonight and actually lightened up and had some fun the state of the universe could tranform and the world could stop and melt. Or, at least the side facing the sun would melt. Am I right or am I right? 


If everyone Wang Chung tonight then there would be a lot of fun, and the world may melt on one side.
Whoops, I just fell asleep for a moment...this getting old is tiring isn't it. Thanks for waking me up before you go go onto another page. If you want more 80s music memes click here.


Wham, fell asleep, but, you woke me up before you go go'd. Thanks.
Want to laugh at Def Leppard memes click here.

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

1980 CAR ADVERTISEMENTS

ADS FOR CARS IN 1980 WERE ALL ABOUT GAS MILEAGE

There are probably plenty of cars you'd associate with the 80s. Like the sleek Trans Am from Knight Rider (aka KITT),


KITT the original Google Car
or the Delorean from Back to the Future.


Back to the Future Delorean was an electric car pioneer
But, what about 'real life' cars. I ran across a bunch of car ads recently while reading some 1980 - 1981 magazines. Ya, I'm serious, I have a big stack of 80s magazines I'm just getting caught up on. Turns out the auto industry was promoting gas mileage and diesel as the selling points. Which makes sense, b/c of the second oil crisis in the late 70s. The cost of gas was on people's minds.

The Chevette - Plain or Fancy? Wow, I remember thinking those cars were ugly back then. Whew, I wasn't off, they are still ugly as sin! The two tone browns are a nice touch. But, they get great gas mileage, 40 miles to the gallon!


80s Chevette - how ugly can one car get?
The Volkswagen Rabbit - they claim driving a Rabbit is driving in comfort. Okay. At least comfort gets 40 miles to the gallon!


1980s VW Rabbit - comfort and great gas mileage
Datson 210 - remember Datson?! What a fancy looking car in wonderful shades of brown with matching interior! And, they boasted an amazing 48 miles per gallon!
80s Datson - overloaded and underpriced
Ford Escort - unleashed onto the market as a car for the world (and world gas prices!) had an impressive 42 miles per gallon. Huh, I didn't think North American cars could take on the world as the ad says, but, they were close.


Early 80s Escort - Ford's attempt at a gas saver
Audi 500 - promoted the solid diesel engine that was good on fuel AND the car had a reclining seat! Wow, that Audi was sweet.


81 Audi 5000S - with a reclining seat
Volkwagen Pickup - aka the El Camino copycat. What the heck is this Frankenstein of a car. It's part VW Rabbit and Part truck. Look at how small it is compared to the guy standing beside it. I wonder how many were actually bought. I never see them around.

80s VW pickup - a tiny El Camino
Datson Trucks - there is a 4x4 that will last a lifetime. Just look at the picture, the thing is climbing a freakin' mountain! The best part is that it feels like you are driving a car, or so the ad claims.


Datson Trucks drive like a car
1982 Toyota Truck - Oh what a feeling, buying a truck that gets 42 miles to the gallon! Another one of those mixed up car/truck vehicles that seemed to be so popular with the auto designers?


Toyota Trucks - 42 miles to the gallon for a truck! What a feeling!